...Lo aNd BeHoLd...
I spent the entire morning in a Macdonald's in LCCT, KL today. It was a time of quiet reflection and sweet solace as I settled some administrative matters. I had a funny feeling of apprehension before arrving in Macau and sure enough the feeling manisfested itself in material form as I reached Macau Airport.
I was singled out from the multitude people, all of various races, meaning racism or stereotypes were probably not their basis of singling me out. I was first sniffed all over by a golden retriever. Then two cops stopped me, showed me their police passes, and took my passport. They started to interrogate me. I answered all their questions calmly. What do I have to hide right? But it wasn't enough. They brought me to an interrogation room, where they made me empty my bag. They interrogated me further and kept speaking to each other in Cantonese. It was a nightmare. Eventually, the female cop made a photocopy of my passport and returned it to me. Way to be welcomed into Macau.
Matters got worst when I turned my handphone on only to realise that my booking for one of the cheaper hotels in Macau had been rejected. Being in a new place, in a moment of desperation, I booked the cheapest available hotel and had to pay a whooping S$130. Sigh. Well, I guess you only live once. The hotel is awesome and the bed is great. Will be living in a 6-men dorm tomorrow with 5 other German guys- $19. A whole lot better.
Upon unpacking, I decided to venture out on my own. I realised that I was on Tapai island. So I took a bus to Macau city after exploring Tapai to some extent. Macau city is where all the action is- Hotels and Casinos galore. I tried one egg-tart and one waffle- That was dinner. Didn't have time to sample more food as I decided to cover as much ground on foot as possible. Thus 9 cross-border attractions in one night.
Today I was thinking about my studies. My entire life people have treated me as the 'smart guy'. I wouldn't say I'm smart, but I try my best. I guess such expectations pressure you to maintain that which you have configured yourself to be in people's eyes. I have convinced myself that learning to me is alot more important than the credit I get for performing well in my studies. After all, I believe when one has it, the ability to be good at that which one is assigned, paper qualifications are rendered secondary. I joined the armed forces to protect my country, to do my best. If they reward me based on merely academic considerations, so be it (such is not the case- there are ample opportunities to showcase your talents. Results are in no way an ultimatum). At least I remain true to myself.
I guess the hard part would be being judged by people at each point in time based on that, of you, which physically manifests itself in front of them rather than that which lies beyond, or even behind-the story behind. That's life right?
aNgeLs BrOuGhT mE HeRe...
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